Oh the joy of change…right? Well, unless it involves packing. I cannot tell you how much I absolutely hate putting things neatly in a box to then pick up that heavy SOB and probably dropping it along the way. And this packing that I was doing was unlike anything else I’d done before. I was about to literally pick my entire life up and move it across the world.
I know what you’re thinking…”What the hell is this girl thinking moving all that way for a job she’s never even attempted before?” And let me assure you sister we are on the S A M E page. I too am now thinking and have been thinking for quite some time “what the hell am I doing?” But…at this point I’ve made the commitment, quit my job, tentatively gotten rid of things (down to my mattress, that’s right folks this is serious stuff), oh and I have officially gotten out of my lease too. So although I could back out, I’d done enough foot work to know that I couldn’t let my cold feet stop me.
One thing I feel sure of is that the universal thing about change is that it is scary…but I decided that this was something I not only wanted but desperately needed. So I did what I do when I get anxious I wrote a list of how I planned to tackle this mess.
For me packing and throwing out and donating my things felt like discovering parts of myself that went missing or grew or evolved and this idea was born.
This series Packing: A Memoir is my step my step guide to moving and making life altering changes. I’m gonna let you guys in on a little secret, so here goes nothing. Read this as many times as you need to until you understand it. I have absolutely no human idea what I am doing. I am no Marie Kondo, nor am I some master at organization. I am a lowly 23 year old who has accumulated a lot of junk and a lot of love.
To me and for me this project is more than a to do list it is an intentional act of love and kindness towards myself during one of the most tender moments in my existence. This project is one of radical self trust and quiet. It is listening to the inner parts of my being…my hope is that when you read this you tune into your “inner being” or whatever you call him/her/them. Maybe your inner being is called spirit, or your gut. Maybe you refer to it by name or by nothing at all. Either way, I hope you find it and quiet your rational mind enough to listen to it…despite your reservations and your fears. I am a firm believer that paths are not serendipitous but intentional and my path isn’t yours and yours isn’t mine. Our own unique journey’s and gifts color the light in which we see and exist within the world. So I can not act as a guide or any kind of authority and that isn’t my intention. My intention is to merely document this process I am in: a whirlwind of grief, hope, love, restoration and sheer exhaustion…and maybe, just maybe we can learn together how to listen better to ourselves and one another.
I have broken this series down into glorified short stories disguised as steps. Twice weekly I will be posting to this platform, so be sure to check back Tuesdays and Thursdays at 2:00pm.
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